porter turns two!

Dear Porter,

Two years old? How are we here already? I’ve been saying I can’t even process it anytime I think about it. It’s true. You’re supposed to still be my little baby. Time has just gone too quickly and I’m not ready for you to turn into a big boy. Excuse me while I go melt in a puddle of tears.

Where do I even begin with you? You are my crazy, wild boy. You have the ability to make me feel like a totally insane person and make me SO happy all in a span of about 20 seconds. I am constantly amazed at your ability to get into any and everything. Your big brother spoiled me when it came to child proofing. As in I didn’t really have to. And now I could probably invent a whole new line of child-proofing devices that I wouldn’t have thought necessary. You are a MESS! The cutest mess I’ve ever seen.

You’ve taught me so much in these 2 years since you came into our world. You stretched my ability to love, which I didn’t even know could be possible. You’ve taught me to laugh more and to let go of my need to control…because you for sure aren’t doing things by the book. And I love that about you, even though it is incredibly trying on my patience most of the time. You are your own little person and you are just figuring out your place in this world. It’s fun seeing you navigate how to be a brother and a friend.

You are such a little lover. I feel sad that as a baby you never really let me snuggle you or rock you. You couldn’t be still! And even though you are still so squirmy and wiggly, you are a big ol’ cuddly bear now and I just eat it up. Please don’t stop wanting to sit right on top of me. Ok, maybe stop when you are about to outgrow me. But let’s not even think about that happening yet!

The joy you find in the smallest things is something I can learn from. I love to watch you discover new things and be so excited about them. I want to experience life through your little eyes.

I am thankful God gave you to us. Although I’m sure I have sometimes wondered what the hell I was thinking having kids, I don’t really mean it for a second. Because my life is what it is because of you and your brother. God uses you to shape me and grow me, and even though it is exhausting and sometimes no fun at all, I am thankful. I can’t wait to see what this year holds for you. I can’t wait to see how you grow and who you become. You are loved more than you could possibly know.

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